Pretty chill mixture in here — even if a tad on the ambiguous side. But it all correllates with how we’ve been rolling over the past month or so. Give it a listen. We hope you enjoy!
No doubt, The Community is a haven for goofiness. But that doesn’t mean we don’t take some stuff seriously. I mean, we take getting head seriously. We take drinking bronsons seriously. There’s probably a few other things we take seriously, but they’re not coming to me right now.
In all seriousness though — we thought we’d share a pretty serious interview with Eric Schmidt, the CEO of Google. This vid is nearly 40 minutes long, but the content is definitely worthwhile. As in: changing our world, how we live, ethics, energy, and information. Some really big questions are addressed here.
This is probably one of the best things I’ve watched in awhile. Seriously. So instead of watching The Biggest Loser or some other crap show on TV, take a moment to listen and think about how our world is changing.
Decent chance you’ve heard of this site before, but we figured, “Hey, what the fuck, ya know?” Texts From Last Nightis a collection of anonymous user submitted texts (with the area code included) that reveal funny situations and musings. Texts From Last Night is basically exploiting “the tendency to press ‘send’ more easily as the night turns to morning.” Here are a few so you get the gist:
(774)
I just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled “dibs!”…
(843)
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
(781)
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed.
———————————————————————————————-
***In the spirit of Texts From Last Night, we’ll share a decent text of our own. Here’s an actual exchange I enjoyed with Community member Lice a few nights ago:
Lice: Sitting next to Steve Kerr at the airport bar.
Tube: Buy him a shot of Jager!
Lice: We just did some Jack.
Tube: Get the fuck outta here. Maybe some vodka next?
Lice: He’s a chill cat. Possibilities are endless.
Tube: Do some shnizzle with him off the bar.
Lice: He said Horace Grant’s shlong is 9 inches limp.
Tube: Don’t doubt that for a second. Kerr sounds like a chill guy!
Lice: Just gave him a Community business card.
Tube: Did you know he’s the all-time leader in 3 pt FG Percentage? That’s as pimp as it gets.
Lice: I didn’t. Bartenders are all over him. I’m riding his coattails aaaall night.
Tube: I heard a night out with Steve Kerr usually turns into two weeks of acid/hookers/cocaine/steak dinners. In that order. Bet that will be a fuckin blast.
Lice: Fear and loathing in Dallas with Steve Kerr. Sign me up.
The Lonely Island comedy group temporarily covered the landmark Hollywood sign with the message “Dick in a Box”. The group hopes to purchase the land to protect it from luxury housing.
On a related note, Vice President Joe “Lightsaber Roni” Biden, left, sparred with his predecessor, Dick “That’s My Name Don’t Wear It Out” Cheney, during talk show appearances Sunday.
On March 19th the verbal attacks will take a backseat to a pay-per-view sword fight between the two. MTV is said to be reproducing the sword fight on its hit show Celebrity Death Match.
A marijuana bust along the U.S. – Mexico border revealed 30 pounds of the drug stuffed into framed pictures of “Jesus Christ” the U.S. Customs and Border Protection agency said Wednesday. When asked what tipped them off Authorities said the 22 year old woman had thought they were pictures of Jesus Christ but they were actually pictures of Jerry Garcia. A Dead giveaway.
Rescue teams are trying to save a hiker who fell into Mount St. Helens. When asked what was the most challenging part of the mission a rescuer responded, “IT’S A VOLCANO!”
Instead of going on about what a chill and decent podcast we have this time around, I’m just gonna say… ya know… whatever. It’s your decision if you wanna jam on it.
Seriously, it’s up to you. I understand that some people just aren’t that into music. They’d rather sit in silence and play solitaire. Hey, ya know, that’s your thing. Whatever you’re into, we respect your decision.
Coroner releases the details about Michael Jackson’s death concluding that Jackson died from “acute propofol intoxication”. The autopsy also found on Jackson’s palm, clearly written in black ink: “Fix nose” “Moonwalk” (crossed out), “Buy new lips”.
An Iranian court has sentenced one person to death and eight others to prison for their parts in anti–government demonstrations. They were convicted of “waging war against God”. When asked about their death sentence, one man replied: “At least now I’ll get dragged to my death and not dragged to see Valentine’s Day“.
The Rev. Ricky Kirton, the pastor who performed the marriage of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren has a message for the troubled couple: “Forgive each other. Be there for each other, and it will work out.” After talking to his pastor Tiger “forgave” his nurse, “was there” for his psychiatrist and “worked it out” all over his waitress. Tiger then proceeded to call his wife, mother, children, and People magazine, crashing his car into every fire hydrant in Mississippi before totaling his SUV full of sex tapes and cyber sleeves into the town’s oldest willow tree.
On Tuesday President Obama held bipartisan talks on jobs as Nancy Pelosi sat in the background focused on keeping her whiskey farts under wraps.
For more on Nancy Pelosi’s jet-setting, tax payer funded booze extravaganzas click here.
When asked about Obama’s plan, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, R-Kentucky, told reporters “the Senate could get there with a small package.” And who better than Mitch McConnell to talk about how to get by with a small package.
*I was watching Jeopardy tonight and was thinking about what a great show it is. Here’s some porn for Jeopardy fans courtesy of Neatorama:
1. The original name of the show was What’s the Question?After pitching it to the network brass, Merv Griffin decided to change the name to the catchier one we know today. The reason? One of the execs thought that the game was a great idea, but that the game needed more jeopardies. NBC ended up buying the show without even seeing a pilot.
2. The winner with the smallest amount of earnings at the end of the game managed to triumph over the other two contestants by keeping a mere dollar. On January 19, 1993, Air Force Lt. Col. Daryl Scott cleverly bid just enough to keep him afloat. The other contestants got the question wrong and lost everything. No one else has ever won by keeping a single George Washington. The answer? “His books ‘No Easy Walk to Freedom’ and ‘The Struggle is My Life’ were published during his imprisonment.” The question? “Who is Nelson Mandela.”
3. The infamous Final Jeopardy music has a name – it’s called “Time for Tony” and it was written by Merv Griffin as a lullaby for his son. If you’re familiar with the song, no doubt it’s not much of a lullaby to you – it serves more as a reminder that time is running out and you’d better hurry. It was tweaked a little bit and renamed “Think!” Over the years, Griffin estimated that royalties from the theme song earned him roughly $70 million.
4. The record for the largest one-day total ever belongs to Ken Jennings, of course. He’s the only contestant to surpass $52,000 in one day, and he surpassed it by a landslide with $75,000. Jennings actually holds 11 of the top 15 earnings spots. One of these top 15 spots was actually earned during Jeopardy! Kids Week by a 12-year-old from Virginia named Kunle Demuren, whose knowledge and quick buzzer finger earned him $49,000.
5. Back in the pre-Trebek era when Art Fleming was the host, contestants could start the audition process by just giving the office in New York a call. They would pass preliminary tests over the phone and then set up a date and time to audition in person if the were eligible. Once they made it to the actual office, potential contestants went through a written test and a faux game. These days, the audition process often starts on the Internet during designated testing times. Sometimes a “Brain Bus” also roams the country and tests Ken Jennings-wannabes.
6. In the show’s entire history, a three-way tie has only happened once. It happened fairly recently too – on March 16, 2007, every single contestant ended Final Jeopardy with $16,000. They all returned the following week to play again. You can see it happen here – Alex Trebek seems quite pleased.
7. “I Lost on Jeopardy” was released by Weird Al Yankovic in 1984. Original host Art Fleming has a cameo as himself and original announcer Don Pardo shows up to tell Yankovic all of the fabulous prizes he failed to win. The funny thing is, Weird Al was actually on Rock & Roll Jeopardy and lost to Gary Dell’Abate, better known as Howard Stern’s sidekick Baba Booey.
8. Julann Griffin, Merv’s wife, was integral to the development of the show. She helped him develop the unique answer-and-question format when they were on a plane ride to New York in the early ’60s. From 1964-1975, a piece Julann composed served as the theme to the show. It was called “Take Ten.”
9. If Alex Trebek seems a little condescending when he corrects players with wrong answers, as if he would know the answers himself even without his cheat sheet, well… he just might. Trebek is pretty brainy. Time magazine once asked him if there was an easy question that he ever didn’t know the answer to, and this was Trebek’s response:
We were doing some shows at Radio City Music Hall in New York City, and during the commercial breaks I’d go out and talk to the people in the audience. And a little boy stood up and asked, When was the Magna Carta signed? I said 1216. I was off by a year. I know a lot about the Magna Carta, but unfortunately I got the date wrong in front of 6,000 people.
He admits that he probably wouldn’t do too well if he actually had to participate on the show, though, due to his slow reflexes. Read more of Trebek’s interview with Time.
You’re in a lounge, all dressed up, scoping out chicks, fancy beverage in your hand — ya know, the usual. Everyone inside looks classy, but deep down they like to party. Maybe snort a few rails and dance like motherfuckers. Indeed, the pent up lounge is waiting to erupt, but there’s one thing missing: bad-ass lounge/disco/dance music. That’s when Dimitri from Paris busts in, starts an all night groove-a-thon, and ordains himself as Decent Communty’s Decent Bastard of the Week.
Dimitri from Paris, believe it or not, is not from Paris. Born in Istanbul, with parents from Greece, Dimitri from Paris is internationally hailed as the master of the mix tape. His musical influences are rooted in 1970s funk and disco sounds, which he then fuses with electro and block party hip hop from the 80s.
Dimitri from Paris has followed a glamorous musical path by recording soundtracks and advertising campaigns for fashion houses Chanel, Jean-Paul Gautier and Yves Saint Laurent and remixing hundreds of artists as diverse as Bjork, The Cardigans, and James Brown.
Primarily, however, Dimitri from Paris is a groove instigator. And compiling groove after groove, upon groove, upon groove, he brings absurd, upbeat jives that ooze with flow. We could rant on about what a great DJ Dimitri from Paris is — but the best way is to listen to him do his thing. Please click below and dance your private parts off.
Dimitri from Paris | Motown Party – Paris – April 12, 2009
This week Decent Community thought we’d alert our readers about a new website dedicated to three of our favorite things: Tom Selleck, waterfalls, and sandwiches. So basic in its premise, Selleck Waterfall Sandwichsimply presents images that combine Selleck, waterfalls, and sandwiches in all their glory.
Each picture contains a new sandwich, a new look at Selleck, and a new waterfall. I guess there’s only so many ways to describe this — but Selleck Waterfall Sandwichis definitely a decent idea. I’m actually a little embarassed we didn’t think of it first.
If Decent Community were assembling a ball club, the first thing we’d do is look for the most chill player available. Then we’d probably scout their mustache, and then probably their hairstyle. Finally, we’d look into their actual abilities on the field. Based on the above criteria, the obvious man to build our team around is Dennis Eckersley. Characters like him make baseball so supremely decent that we feel it’s our obligation to honor “The Eck” as our Decent Bastard of the Week.
Let’s first address his playing career. Six time All-Star. 1988 ALCS MVP. 1989 World Series champion. 1992 AL MVP and Cy Young. One of two players (Smoltz) with seasons of 20 wins and 50 saves. Two-time Rolaids Relief Man of the Year. First ballot Hall of Famer. Now that we got that out of the way….
His look. Following in the tradition mustache-wearing Hall of Fame relievers (Gossage, Sutter, Fingers), with a sort of lettuce/mop/mullet hairstyle and slim physique, Eck looked kinda like a snarling pirate on the mound. His sidearm delivery, however, more closely resembled an elegant swan. Put all of this together, throw in that stylish A’s uniform, and you’ve got a model of how a decent ball player should look.
Astonishingly, Eckersley the decent bastard posessed chill levels that rivaled his remarkable appearence. Widely hailed as a legendary teammate, his intense competitive nature never interfered with his laid-back aura. Listening to him in the Red Sox broadcast booth, you get a feel for Eck’s totally non-contrived character.
Then there’s his lingo: salad (off-speed pitches), slide piece (slider), educated cheese (mediocre fastball thrown by a veteran pitcher), gay cheese (fastball in the mid-80’s), warm cheese (low 90’s fastball), easy gas (effortless heat), hair (comes off a upper 90’s fastball), Gas Masterson (guy who pumps serious fastballs), and johnson (home run, chump hitter, pretty much anything he wants it to mean).
Even if we could “paint” as well as Dennis Eckersley, we could never design a more decent ball player. Our ideal five tool guy (+pitcher, +hairstyle, +mustache, +lingo, +chill levels), The Community sweats The Eck almost as much as we sweat bronsons. For it’s our opinion that this bastard was/is the most completely decent player to ever put on a major league uniform.
Wazzaaa Dece lovers! We’re ecstatic to jam out the tenth edition of our podcast. The Decent Atlanta studios recently upgraded their equipment, and the result is the most professionally produced podcast yet. It’s smoother in every regard, and you’ll really notice the enhanced sound quality.
However, we’re happy to say that all the slick production takes a backseat to the music. The tenth volume is the most cohesive podcast to date — really capturing a chill vibe that we hope will appeal to a broad audience. It’s a little less jam-heavy than usual, but I’m willing to bet that everyone will find some goods they’re really into. Seriously, we’d really appreciate you giving this a listen. One love!
Just as the ancient Egyptians needed monarchs to guide them and provide their civilization with fruitful bounties, so does The Community. Whether it’s teachings, deliverence, or even salvation — sustenance from a higher authority is integral to our soul. That’s why this week we’re saluting The Pharaoh by naming him our Decent Bastard of the Week.
Go back twelve years or so to a simpler time when rap music, sports, dime bags, and busting heads were the primary concerns of many. That was the height of The Pharaoh’s reign. Dropping heavy beats, football knowledge, and shwag herbs with a slew of rough characters he welcomed to his domain, The Pharaoh served as figurehead to a kingdom unrivaled to this day. He also had a huge fucking TV and a pitbull.
And while you may think The Pharaoh was a thug by the description above, in fact he was as gentle as they come. Therein lies the greatness of The Pharaoh. His lifestyle and what he projected were exactly what his community so desperately needed during this time period. Whether he was dishing out a bag of grass or a can of whoopass, he was doing it for the greater good.
The Pharaoh’s reign may not be as robust as it was twelve years ago, but that doesn’t mean he’s no longer The Pharaoh. Nay. In fact, it’s The Communty’s stance that The Pharaoh’s dynasty is still in its infancy. Because while he took power at a young age, The Pharoah’s virtues (and his love for weed) will never die. Teach us great Pharaoh! Teach us!
The big news heading into 2010 is that Tubesteak is turning into a heavy duty flautist. Indeed — the bastard got a flute from his aunt for Christmas and his new metal tube hasn’t left his hands since. It’s only a matter of time before Tubesteak turns into a flute virtuoso, following in the footsteps of one of The Community’s favorite flute-meistros, Herbie Mann.
Granted, Tube isn’t as hairy as Herbie Mann, but their allegiance to the groove is one and the same. Since Herbie’s passing in 2003, the jazz flute world has been seeking someone to “jam on funky rhythms that are comfortable to float on top of.” The Community is happy to announce we’ve got the “mann.”
Please stay tuned for some live web concerts from Tubesteak, which will be broadcast on Decent Community. No doubt Tube will be bringing funky, sensual notes to our Community and beyond. In meantime, you can listen to Herbie Mann and Duane Allman get down on a deep jam, which I think is about scoring with ladies:
Yo, ho, whoa, bros, hoes and average joes! Before dropping The Decent Community Christmas Opus on the general public, we figured a dedication should come first. For starters, we’d like to thank all the shorties who hook up with our ugly friends and do the number sixty-nine with them. We’d also like to give a shout out to Paul Verhoeven, Edward Neumeier, and Michael Miner — the director and writers, respectively, of our favorite holiday film, RoboCop. (Talk about an opus!)
That’s just a start. Our opus is also dedicated to Michael Bivens, milky/mushy cleavage, and minestrone soup. Tiger Woods’ hardon gets our respect because it’s been so active. But if we’re talking about restless, hairy johnsons, then Brian Dennehy’s fur stick has to be in the discussion. And let’s mention the regular old bulge in a guy’s pants while we’re here.
What would an opus dedication be without The Rhombus? Or anus beads? Or Earl the Skoal stealer (that bastard!)? It would be crappola! Other dedications include uppers (you got any?), swap meets, and well-aimed snots rockets that go “kaboom” when hitting their targets.
There’s a few more dedications: Zack Barnes, blunt wraps, and our parents for boning and making us born. Skateboards and BMX bikes make the cut for enabling us to do ollies and wheelies (hell yeah, bro!). Since it’s a Christmas Opus dedication, we’ll also include snow. As in cocaine.
Finally, if this is going to be a legit Christmas Opus Dedication, we must mention sucking face at parties, wild geese, flirtatious facial expressions, and chilling out. Our Chirstmas Opus is pretty serious, and we’ve done our best not to leave anything out in our dedications. If we have, let us know. If not, have a Decent Christmas Party — control your buzz and don’t barf or pee on anything that’s not yours.
Decent Community and Milton Bradley have paired up to produce a chill and far out new board game called “DECE”. The much anticipated game is designed for participants to “embrace their weirdness through odd challenges, side games, exceptional performances, and measures of uniqueness.”
Milton Bradley had been trying like mofos to strike a deal with the Community in an effort to bring their brand of decency to a board game. “We approached Decent Community because we felt their trademark funky style would translate beautifully into a game experience,” said Mr. Milton Bradley, the head spokesman for Milton Bradley. “To say we funked it out would be like saying Salma Hayek’s tits are just OK.”
The Community is also pleased with how the game turned out. “If this game were a chick, I’d fuck her brains out,” said Tubesteak.
You can order the DECE board game from this website. You can also probably pick it up at toy stores and sex shops in your local community. But buy it soon, because DECE is expected to sell like ghetto crack this Christmas season.
Many people have been asking where I’ve been. Good question – let me explain.
In between eating Hot Pocket sandwiches and looking for cool sunglasses, I have spent every waking moment on a very important Fall Community Project. What you ask? It’s simple yet complex, both mainstream and far out… It’s a playlist for Tubesteak.
Sounds simple you may be thinking. Well, think again. Making a playlist for Tubesteak is like painting a neoclassical style painting for Picasso. The dude is a Mix Tape Master, the Sultan of Song. A Vibe Vampire, sinking his tapes into people’s cassette players across the world. Turning ordinary humans into funkifed dance freaks.
So without further adieu, I present you with my Fall Community Project. I call it:
Tubesteak’s Playlist an ode to the Mix Style Series:
1) Phil Collins – Sussudio
2) Hall and Oates – Private Eyes
3) Men At Work – Down Under
4) Huey Lewis And The News – Stuck With You
5) Tommy Tutone – 867-5309/Jenny
6) Phil Collins – Don’t Lose My Number
7) Genesis – I Can’t Dance
8) Hall and Oates – Maneater
9) The Blues Brothers – Soul Man
10) Huey Lewis And The News – Back In Time
11) Boston – More Than A Felling
12) The Police – Every Breath You Take
13) Bill Joel – Tell Her About It
14) A-Ha – Take On Me
15) Kenny Loggins – Danger Zone
16) Genesis – Invisible Touch
17) Tom Cochrane – Life Is A Highway
18) Don Henley – The Boys Of Summer
19) The Cars – Shake It Up
20) Steve Winwood – Valerie
21) Van Halen – Jump
22) Don Henley – All She Wants To Do Is Dance
23) Toto – Africa
24) Kenny Loggins – Footloose
25) Robert Palmer – Addicted To Love
26) Steve Winwood – Higher Love
Maybe if you leave a comment Tubesteak will make a podcast of Tubesteak’s Playlist for us all to enjoy…
Hello DC! Just posted what’s probably have the most decent podcast thus far. Trust me — you’d be missing out if you didn’t jive on these jams. Good mix here, including DC’s fave jam from Phish’s Exile on Main Street cover at Festival 8. We also got some swamp rock, bone-in funk, and some more subtle numbers that totally seal the deal.
The Community would also appreciate any feedback on these larries. Maybe some suggestions, or some jams you’re dying for other people to hear. Just give us a holler — DecentCommunity@gmail.com. We’d love to hear about what you’re listening to, ways to improve to the podcast, etc. Really hope you enjoy the podcast.
Decent Community has been alerted to a recent study that says people distracted by their Blackberrys and iPhones suffer a greater loss of IQ than a person smoking marijuana. So for all you people out there who think toking herbs isn’t decent, maybe they should consider chilling out with the emails and texts.
This study makes total sense. I picture all those chicks out there who walk around holding their phones with their palm up (above, pic #1), ravaging their little devices like a squirrel attacking the season’s last acorn. Shouting things like “Like!” and inputting prose like “OMG 2much!” as their IQ deteriorates into something smaller than a pointy little nipple.
To everyone — take a breather from technology. Clear that noggin of yours every once in awhile. It’s probably better to not know what’s going on every second of everyone’s life. The habit intensifies to the point where you’re not thinking for yourself and not relying on yourself. If you have difficulty ripping yourself away from your Blackberry, maybe some grass will mellow you out — you’d be lowering your IQ anyway, right?
“I let the ringers do the talking.” So says Alan Francis, one of the greatest horseshoe pitchers the world has ever known. This mustachioed marksman has won a record-setting 15 Men’s World Horseshoe titles since 1989. During one tournament, Alan Francis threw a record 64 consecutive ringers! Talk about a Burlington Shower! Talk about Alan Francis being named our Decent Bastard of the Week!
The good-natured Francis is not only a tremendous shoe tosser — he’s also a decent guy. Known as the game’s greatest ambassador, he’s the ultimate celebrity on the horseshoe circuit. “Even his opponents like him,” says Paul Stewart, president of the National Horseshoe Pitchers Association (NHPA). “He’s a polite and humble winner.”
Francis, who works as a salesman for a commercial printing company when he’s not throwing ringers, could get any chick he wants. But in a move displaying ultimate allegiance to horseshoes, he married a babe who is also a world-class shoe tosser. “She is the ringer for my ‘metal stake,'” says Francis.
While most of us have wet dreams of possessing Alan Francis’ sharp-shooting prowess, he recognizes his duty as the world’s pre-eminent horseshoe sniper. “I have a God-given talent that I shouldn’t waste,” he says. “I want to be as good as I can be, because I know people enjoy watching people throw ringers.”
Nothing says “I’m a chill-ass stoner” like the lighter game. Smoke a doob or two, maybe throw on some jams and creatively balance a lighter on the back of your hand. It’s total freestyle. Improvise, go with the flow — be smooth. Explore your range.
How do you play? First you have to mellow out. Then you stand up and toss the lighter around and balance it on the back of your paw. You can play solo, but the vibes are better with more people involved — more sharing going on, tapping into the communal spirit. That sort of thing.
People who are dank at the lighter game are the same people you want to become friends with. They obviously have their shit together and give off an artful aura. These guys are expressing themselves through an otherwise non-existent medium by taking the lifeless lighter, adding their own colorful and imaginative stylings, and thus rendering their own version of what is and what isn’t.
decent community 
