Decent Community Monologue

Coroner releases the details about Michael Jackson’s death concluding that Jackson died from “acute propofol intoxication”.  The autopsy also found on Jackson’s palm, clearly written in black ink:  “Fix nose”  “Moonwalk” (crossed out), “Buy new lips”.

An Iranian court has sentenced one person to death and eight others to  prison for their parts in antigovernment demonstrations.  They were convicted of “waging war against God”.  When asked about their death sentence, one man replied:  “At least now I’ll get dragged to my death and not dragged to see Valentine’s Day“.

The Rev. Ricky Kirton, the pastor who performed the marriage of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren has a message for the troubled couple:  “Forgive each other.  Be there for each other, and it will work out.”  After talking to his pastor Tiger “forgave” his nurse, “was there” for his psychiatrist and “worked it out” all over his waitress.  Tiger then proceeded to call his wife, mother, children, and People magazine, crashing his car into every fire hydrant in Mississippi before totaling his SUV full of sex tapes and cyber sleeves into the town’s oldest willow tree.

On Tuesday President Obama held bipartisan talks on jobs as Nancy Pelosi sat in the background focused on keeping her whiskey farts under wraps.

For more on Nancy Pelosi’s jet-setting, tax payer funded booze extravaganzas click here.

When asked about Obama’s plan, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, R-Kentucky, told reporters “the Senate could get there with a small package.”  And who better than Mitch McConnell to talk about how to get by with a small package.

Hey Mitch, how big’s your dick?

Pequeño

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Patrick Swayze Was One Decent Dude

Patrick Swayze passed away at 57 Monday evening after a 20-month battle with pancreatic cancer. Why was Swayze so decent?

  • No one made chicks’ panties damper than he did during his prime days from 1987-91, when he starred in “Dirty Dancing,” “Ghost” and “Point Break.” He was named People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive in 1991.
  • The song he sang on the “Dirty Dancing” Soundtrack, She’s Like the Wind, became such a big hit, it was covered in European concerts by David Hasselhoff.
  • Swayze was never caught driving drunk, but he almost got busted flying drunk. He had to make an emergency landing in a single-engine plane he was flying in 2000 and reports were that he was extremely hammered at the time. He even allegedly asked people who came out to see what was up with a plane int he middle of the road for help getting rid of a 30-pack and an open bottle of wine before the cops showed up.
  • While many of today’s celebrities have many relationships and affairs during their time. Swayze reportedly was a man of honor. He met his wife in 1970 when he was 18 and she was 14. They married five years later and remained married until his death.
  • Swayze co-starred in one of the best Saturday Night Live skits of all time: The Chipendales tryout with Chris Farley ( watch it below).

Rest in Peace, Patrick Swayze, from all of us here at Decent Community.

Seth Rogen is a Chump

The Community’s distaste for Seth Rogen has come to a boil after the ugly, unfunny, fat-ass bastard issued a petty retort when the boys on Entourage called him out during Sunday night’s episode. How is Rogen considered a legitimate actor? He’s the lowest-brow, blandest “actor” who has only benefited from appearing typically-formulated comedies that bank on infinite recycled fatboy/potty/weed humor — which is dumbed down and force-fed to the masses. Dude is a chump.

And where does he get off criticizing Entourage? One of the more decent shows around, and this repulsive shithead has the nerve to front? Where does he get off? He’s only making himself look worse!

The Community would hereby like to start a movement — and it can begin at www.SethRogenIsAChump.com. We need to expose this fraud for what he is. His shtick is tired and predictable. He’s unoriginal, but he thinks he’s the shit. And God — he’s ugly! Let’s put an end to this charade that’s his career before it goes any further!

Check Out Some Decent Videos

The Community thought it would be a decent move to start posting more videos of random goods we think our readers may get a kick out of. So we added this new little “thingy” to the right that will feature a steady a rotation of heady/interesting/funny clips.

Check ’em out if you’re bored, and please feel free to send over a link to a vid you think others may enjoy. We’re trying to ramp up this up this Decent website — but it will only go as far as our Community wants us to go. So please be in touch with us — DecentCommunity@gmail.com — and share in the decency.

There’s Nothing More Decent Than a Good Ole’ Fashion Drive-In

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Drive-in movie theaters are fun, yeah?  Yeah they are.

From the heady concession stands to the old school intros and music during the intermission; drive-ins are more than simply nostalgic, they are straight up decent!

Aside from a drive-your-car-to-a-field-in-vehicle-orgy where else can you find a field of young professionals getting intimate in the back of their flat bed pickup trucks, chilling with the top down in their convertibles or reclined in the front seat their Accord?

Pros:  Prices are by the carload so pack ’em in.  You have the option to watch 2 movies at no additional charge.  The comfort and privacy of your own rig.  Beer, wine and/or herb consummation is often permitted as well as cranking heat bags.  Don’t know what cranking a heat bag is?  Email, decentcommunity@gmail.com and we’ll fill you in.

Decent Facts:  The closest drive-in to Boston is in Mendon (40 minute drive).  There’s also one in Welfleet on the Cape.  The Weymouth drive-in was one of the first 5 drive-in theatres in America.  There are also fly-in theatres for small planes.  If your car runs out of batteries staff will often jump your car — free of charge.

Decent Community Reviews Godzilla

godzilla

Editors note:  This post is focused on the decency of the name/word Godzilla and less on Godzilla himself.

Godzilla (ゴジラ Gojira) could be the most decent name of all time.  It can convey so much in sum of very little.  A cute puppy could be named Godzilla — oh, how cute you named him Godzilla…ohhhhh… ahhhhh.  A drunk stumbling buffoon can be referred to as Godzilla — watch out for Godzilla Tubesteak he’s been drinking since 11am!  A famous Boston eatery refers to one of their massive burgers as a Godzilla Burger — urhghghghghghgh

Wikepedia is telling me that Godzilla means “gorilla whale”!  How decent is that!?  I spend about 90 percent of my day thinking about cool combinations of animals (tiger/elephant, horse/man, snake/dog, etc.), but a gorilla/whale could be the most decent animal combo ever. The decency of Godzilla is quite evident.  Not many people know this because I don’t like writing about my private live, but my first born is named Godzilla.  Godzilla Ron Head. 

Decent Love Story

Wanted to share this beautiful love story about a fat, ugly man named Gus and a supposed lesbian named Yvette. Both have fallen on some hard times and have had extreme difficulties getting laid!

Enter destiny (and smooth singer/guitarist/surfer/ladies man Jack Johnson). Out of options, Gus approaches the apparent lesbian in a department store and entices her with some concert tickets. Find out what happens to this horny, repulsive pair once their paths finally cross!