Take a Trip On the Youtube Time Machine

Dude! Check out the YouTube time machine. Start out in 1860 go through every year till the present. Pretty chill stuff — like footage from the 1910 World Series. So whip out your roni and let the stroking begin.

Let’s Get Serious For a Sec

No doubt, The Community is a haven for goofiness. But that doesn’t mean we don’t take some stuff seriously. I mean, we take getting head seriously. We take drinking bronsons seriously. There’s probably a few other things we take seriously, but they’re not coming to me right now.

In all seriousness though — we thought we’d share a pretty serious interview with Eric Schmidt, the CEO of Google. This vid is nearly 40 minutes long, but the content is definitely worthwhile. As in: changing our world, how we live, ethics, energy, and information. Some really big questions are addressed here.

This is probably one of the best things I’ve watched in awhile. Seriously. So instead of watching The Biggest Loser or some other crap show on TV, take a moment to listen and think about how our world is changing.

Decent Site of the Week: Texts From Last Night

Decent chance you’ve heard of this site before, but we figured, “Hey, what the fuck, ya know?” Texts From Last Night is a collection of anonymous user submitted texts (with the area code included) that reveal funny situations and musings. Texts From Last Night is basically exploiting “the tendency to press ‘send’ more easily as the night turns to morning.” Here are a few so you get the gist:

(774)

I just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled “dibs!”…

(843)

Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true

(781)

I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed.

———————————————————————————————-

***In the spirit of Texts From Last Night, we’ll share a decent text of our own. Here’s an actual exchange I enjoyed with Community member Lice a few nights ago:

Lice: Sitting next to Steve Kerr at the airport bar.
Tube: Buy him a shot of Jager!
Lice: We just did some Jack.
Tube: Get the fuck outta here. Maybe some vodka next?
Lice: He’s a chill cat. Possibilities are endless.
Tube: Do some shnizzle with him off the bar.
Lice: He said Horace Grant’s shlong is 9 inches limp.
Tube: Don’t doubt that for a second. Kerr sounds like a chill guy!
Lice: Just gave him a Community business card.
Tube: Did you know he’s the all-time leader in 3 pt FG Percentage? That’s as pimp as it gets.
Lice: I didn’t. Bartenders are all over him. I’m riding his coattails aaaall night.
Tube: I heard a night out with Steve Kerr usually turns into two weeks of acid/hookers/cocaine/steak dinners. In that order. Bet that will be a fuckin blast.
Lice: Fear and loathing in Dallas with Steve Kerr. Sign me up.

DC GIF Caption Contest x3

“Cereal laced with crack.”

Continue reading

Decent Site of the Week: I’m So Bad At Sex.com

This week’s decent site of the week offers some embarrassing stories from the boning scene. I’m So Bad At Sex features anonymous bastards who send in some wacky shit detailing hilarious sexual escapades. Of course, some tales are better than others — but after reading I’m So Bad At Sex, we all feel like we’re masters at doing the wild thing. Here’s a sample:

“I’m generally pretty bad at sex. However, my most recent experience has lead me to quit having sex all together. I was having sex with a girl who had at least 40 pounds on me. I somehow mounted her and was humping away. Then I received a whisper in my ear “Stop, please just stop”. I had been having sex with her belly fat, and had already came. I’m so bad at sex.”

Decent Site of the Week: Accidental Dong

This week The Community has named Accidental Dong as our decent site of the week. Here’s the description from their website: “It’s happened a million times. You draw an innocent little sketch for a friend or family member, only to realize moments later, ‘Crap. I just drew a Godzilla-like penis in front of Grandma.’ Well my faux phallic friends, this blog is the home for all those wayward wangs out there.”

Accidental Dong has all sorts of pseudo dicks — some more noticeable than others. Seriously, how many times in your life have you thought, “Bro! Fuckin A! That looks just like a shlong!” This website offers a decent collection of such instances.

Interesting eBay T-Shirts

Would you buy this shirt for 29 grand?

Damn. There’s some serious shit on eBay. You can find pretty much anything you want on that piece, and decent t-shirts are no exception. Let’s examine a few t-shirts The Commuity deems “the real deal”:

Transcelestians: This badboy is quite possibly the most rare Star Wars collectible on any planet. A t-shirt made for crew when filming began for A New Hope, aka Star Wars aka Transcelestians (the working title). This is such obscure Star Wars trivia that when this working title is googled, there are no results…seriously, try it. It was once owned by Ben Burtt, the four time Academy Award winning sound technician who got Darth breathing heavy. Price: $29,000

Beatles Butcher: The true origins of this relic are unknown. Its controversial artwork is derived from the infamous Beatles Butcher album that was released in 1966 and subsequently pulled from shelves because of widespread complaints. The original banned albums are worth a small fortune and this tee is arguably even more scarce. Is it an extremely rare record store promo?  Or one of the earliest examples of bootlegging? Either way it’s a vintage artifact. Price: $20,000

Duran Duran Concert Cutoff T: This 1984 piece is from Duran Duran’s first stadium tour of the United States. A film crew led by director Russell Mulcahy followed the band closely during this tour, leading to the documentary film Sing Blue Silver and the accompanying concert film Arena. Just before making their stadium rounds, the band appeared on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine and won two Grammy awards. This t-shirt is one of the foremost relics of a special time in Duran Duran’s history. (And it’s a cutoff!) Price: $11

Allman Bros/The Band/Grateful Dead Summer Jam: This beauty is my second favorite shirt on the list (behind the Duran Duran T). Quite the Summer jam going down at Watkins Glenn in 1973! A heady time for all bands, but especially The Grateful Dead, who played their tightest/cleanest jams throughout 73-74. It’s a great looking shirt and perhaps a decent deal when compared to this other Grateful Dead T. Price: $1,500

Iron Maiden, Florida ’87 — “Vice is Nice” Tour: This 3/4 sleeve baseball style t-shirt is pretty freakin heavy. As in, heavy metal! Iron Maiden fans are known to hoard their concert t’s — but this rare find documenting their ’87 run through the Sunshine State is a true gem. Think about it — it’s 1987 and you’re in Florida on the “Vice is Nice” tour with Iron Maiden. It gets no better. Price: $950

For The Ladies: Sights From French Fashion Show

In the next installment of our “For the Ladies” series, we bring you some of the more marvelous sights from the Haute Couture Spring/Summer 2010 collection. This is the cream of the fashion crop, the kind of stuff chicks drool over and dream of wearing to the royal ball at some fancy European castle.

Anyway, enjoy the pictorial ladies, and thanks for your continued support of Decent Community. The last thing Tubesteak, Helmet and I want is the Community to be a sausage-fest, so tell all your girlfriends about how decent we are and feel free to send bikini pictures to decentcommunity@gmail.com. Please don’t send bikini photos of those unhealthy anorexic gross model chicks though — we’re sure they’re nice people and all, but they kinda freak us out.

Who is the Chillest Member of Phish?

Bro. Why do questions have to be so difficult? I’m trying to figure this shit out, but it’s kinda insane. This whole question, ya know? I’ve been sitting here for the past three hours going back and forth in my head. Page is fuckin chill, ya know? But Mike is mellow as shit too! The way he just stands there and bobs his head sometimes? That’s laid back. I bet it would be really chill to chill with Trey. And Fishman, man, that dude probably just lets it his shit flow — which I think is pretty chill.

Fuck man, I guess if I gotta say, it’s Page. Ya know, cause he’s just fuckin chill, bro. What do you guys think?

Decent Community Word Search

As you probably know, DC is pretty fond getting down on games. So today we wanted to drop a decent word search on your ass. It’s a fun little way to pass the time, increase your detective abilities, and hunt down decency. In fact, there’s a reward for the first person to email us a successfully completed version of this word search! For a printable PDF, it’s at this link: DC WORD SEARCH. Have fun, you bastards!

Decent Reads of the Week

Stop the presses! The Community thought it would be a good move to bring new looks at decency by sharing some of the chill articles that come across our desk. So we’re instituting a new post we’ll get up every so often called “Decent Reads of the Week,” in which we’ll provide goods we feel are insightful, funny, weird, or what have you. (If you come across something you think we should share, send it along to DecentCommunity@gmail.com.) Here’s some goods for this week:

Undressing the Terror Threat (WSJ)

Briton jailed for four years in Dubai after customs find cannabis weighing less than a grain of sugar under his shoe (Daily Mail, UK)

Brother gets revenge on sister with legendary facebook post. (SoJones.com)

John Lennon wrote “Come Together” as a campaign song for Timothy Leary’s race against Ronald Reagan for governor of California. (NYT)

Breaking down the sentence: “Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.” (Wiki)

Dude shits his pants on a date and tries to figure out what to do. (Lamebook.com)

KFC Thinks Black People Like Fried Chicken or Something (KnucklesUnited.com)

Sorry MILFs: Carnival Bans Cougar Cruises (Miami New Times)

What Makes Us Happy? (The Atlantic)

John Updike on Golf (NYT)

Decent Site of the Week: Match that Muff

Good day Decent Community! Hope the holidays and New Year treated everyone decently! Today we wanted to share a decent link we’ve been made aware of — a quasi-pornish-fun-game site called Match that Muff. You may recall we featured  a similar site a while back called Guess Her Muff, in which you guessed what a chick’s muff looked like. It could have been anything. Well, Match that Muff offers choices, so you’re not working with a blank slate.

This game is more fun, because you can actually be right or wrong, and instead of having some ambiguous picture in your mind there’s a reassuring concreteness with Match that Muff. Which basically means you’re not keeping score yourself and can’t cheat. Hope you guys enjoy the site!

P.S. Is there a more fitting word in our sexual lexicon than “muff”? I don’t think so.

World Stats in Real Time

Gosh! The Community couldn’t resist sharing this site we just came across that updates significant world statistics. Like the world’s population at the time of this is 6,806,613,380 but it goes up more than a person per second. It’s not only population that this thing details —  there’s government, economics, society, media, environment, food, water, energy, and health.

It’s wild to see the way these statistics move. For instance, there were 14,956,951,525 cigarettes smoked so far today, and that increases faster than 100,000/second. Another — if gas is consumed at the current rate, there are 60,784 days left until we run out. There have been 40,490,683 abortions so far this year. We could go on, but you should check this site for yourself. It really paints a vivid picture of the world we live in.

The Lighter Game

Nothing says “I’m a chill-ass stoner” like the lighter game. Smoke a doob or two, maybe throw on some jams and creatively balance a lighter on the back of your hand. It’s total freestyle. Improvise, go with the flow — be smooth. Explore your range.

How do you play? First you have to mellow out. Then you stand up and toss the lighter around and balance it on the back of your paw. You can play solo, but the vibes are better with more people involved — more sharing going on, tapping into the communal spirit. That sort of thing.

People who are dank at the lighter game are the same people you want to become friends with. They obviously have their shit together and give off an artful aura. These guys are expressing themselves through an otherwise non-existent medium by taking the lifeless lighter, adding their own colorful and imaginative stylings, and thus rendering their own version of what is and what isn’t.

Phish Festivalography

Phish’s Festival 8 is upon us, going down this weekend in Indio, CA. Sure to be a great time. To honor this occasion, Dece Community wanted to share a very heady program that just went down over the past week on Sirius/XM radio called Phish Festivalography.

The program chronicles all seven festivals — Clifford Ball, Great Went, Lemonwheel, Camp Oswego, Big Cypress, It, Coventry — through interviews with band members and jams. There’s also a preview of Festival 8. You get some really cool, insightful, interesting commentary from Trey, Mike, Fishman, and Page — things like how they named and concepted the festivals, the first glow stick war, eating heavy-duty pot brownies, and the hardships at Coventry. That’s just a small sampling of the material.

The choice jams interspersed throughout the program are also bad-ass. Give this shit a listen. Each part is about an hour long, but if you’re a Phish phan we have no doubt this will be a decent investment of your time.

DOWNLOAD PHISH FESTIVALOGRAPHY: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Decent Site of the Week: Badass of the Week

In a similar vein as Decent Community’s Decent Bastard of the Week, but a bit more hardcore/serious, Badass of the Week offers a “relentless onslaught of badassitude [that] is guaranteed to get you so pumped up that you will want to quit your crappy job, smash your office desk into splinters with your forehead and start a new career as a professional face-wrecker.”

Well written, and featuring dudes such as Darth Vader, Ivan Drago, Steve Irwin, Evel Knievel, Predator, and Zeus, Badass of the Week exists to “satisfy your insatiable desire to read about grown people punching each other in the mouth or beating each other about the head and neck in a most furious manner.” Check it out. It’s a solid, fun, and usually interesting read.

Decent Site of the Week: Shit My Dad Says

Just in case you haven’t read this wonderful site (technically not a website, rather a Twitter feed), Decent Community would like to present to you Shit My Dad Says. It’s written by a dude named Justin, who in the description of his feed writes, “I’m 29. I live with my 73-year-old dad. He is awesome. I just write down shit that he says.”

And the shit that he says is hilarious! Picture an old patronizing and condescending grouch who says what’s on his mind because he doesn’t give a fuck anymore. That’s essentially the premise of Shit My Dad Says. We all know grumpy old bastards like this, and this site really makes us appreciate their old school authenticity.

Announcing Decent Community Yodeling School

Since joining The Community, Decent Contributor Fugaze has been pressing relentlessly to branch out our operation — kind of diversify our outlets of decency. Among his dearest ventures was the Decent Community Yodeling School — a pet project very close to Mr. Fugaze’s heart. Well today his dream comes to fruition. The Community is opening up a yodeling school in downtown New Bedford, MA at Fugaze’s residence.

It’s been a long time coming, but our finances are finally straight and we’re outta the red! The Decent Community Yodeling School will likely be the first of many enterprises we’ll be announcing in the next six months in our new “Diversifying Decency” campaign.

Fugaze will serve as the primary yodeling instructor. Having yodeled for the past sixteen years as an apprentice of Rod Erickson (video above) and earning the designation of “Yodeling Chieftan,” Fugaze will turn you into the yodeler you’ve always dreamed of becoming. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to train under a master, become more popular, and live out your yodeling dreams. Please send an email to DecentCommunity@gmail.com for more information.

Lady Caption Contest x 3

beaster lady

“The Goddess of Shwag”

 

aer lingus

“Prototypical Aer Lingus stewardess.”

 

 

“Nice chimichangas!”

Decent Site of the Week: The Lefsetz Letter

Bob Lefsetz, music industry guru.

If you’re a music fan and are looking for invaluable insights into “the core of the music business,” then The Lefsetz Letter should be required reading. Having been published for over 25 years — first as hard copy, then an email newsletter and now in blog form — The Lefsetz Letter most definitely brings the goods. In an always an entertaining read, Bob Lesfetz examines the role of major record labels, grassroots development, downloading/file sharing, and personal reflections on music in an ‘answer-to-nobody’ manner.

Just take quick look at his rant on the VMAs and MTV’s deterioration. Or his advertising/music industry parallels. But really, it’s all in there — and it’s always an engaging, enlightening, and most importantly decent perspective from one of the music industry’s most influential analysts.