Dedicating Our Christmas Opus

Yo, ho, whoa, bros, hoes and average joes! Before dropping The Decent Community Christmas Opus on the general public, we figured a dedication should come first. For starters, we’d like to thank all the shorties who hook up with our ugly friends and do the number sixty-nine with them. We’d also like to give a shout out to Paul Verhoeven, Edward Neumeier, and Michael Miner — the director and writers, respectively, of our favorite holiday film, RoboCop. (Talk about an opus!)

That’s just a start. Our opus is also dedicated to Michael Bivens, milky/mushy cleavage, and minestrone soup. Tiger Woods’ hardon gets our respect because it’s been so active. But if we’re talking about restless, hairy johnsons, then Brian Dennehy’s fur stick has to be in the discussion. And let’s mention the regular old bulge in a guy’s pants while we’re here.

What would an opus dedication be without The Rhombus? Or anus beads? Or Earl the Skoal stealer (that bastard!)? It would be crappola! Other dedications include uppers (you got any?), swap meets, and well-aimed snots rockets that go “kaboom” when hitting their targets.

There’s a few more dedications: Zack Barnes, blunt wraps, and our parents for boning and making us born. Skateboards and BMX bikes make the cut for enabling us to do ollies and wheelies (hell yeah, bro!). Since it’s a Christmas Opus dedication, we’ll also include snow. As in cocaine.

Finally, if this is going to be a legit Christmas Opus Dedication, we must mention sucking face at parties, wild geese, flirtatious facial expressions, and chilling out. Our Chirstmas Opus is pretty serious, and we’ve done our best not to leave anything out in our dedications. If we have, let us know. If not, have a Decent Christmas Party — control your buzz and don’t barf or pee on anything that’s not yours.

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