Decent Football Picks, Week 12

It’s Thanksgiving weekend and us football fans have a lot to be thankful for. Here’s a few of them:

1. The Pats have had no major injuries: Brady is still healthy, as is Moss and Welker. Jerod Mayo made it back sooner than expected after leaving the opening-night game against Buffalo. Fred Taylor and Sammy Morris are on the shelf, but with the Pats being a pass-happy team it really doesn’t matter. The left side of the line is a concern but not a season-ending one.

2. The Colts-Pats AFC Title Game is setting up to be the biggest non-Superbowl game ever: I can’t f’ing wait for this matchup. The Colts got lucky the first time. This could be the highest-rated non-championship game in sports history.

3. Ochocinco: Yea, some people see him as an asshole, but I think Ochocinco is good for the league. He’s a breath of fresh air in a league that is always trying to crack down on celebrations and creativity. Plus, I got to give the guy credit, he backs up every ounce of smack he talks and “Child Please” is pure gold.

4. Eric Mangini is terrible: Ever since Mangini busted Belichick in Spygate and told the Boston Herald he taped the Superbowl walkthrough against the Rams (That was the biggest secret of the whole Spygate saga, who was the rat who spilled the beans about the Superbowl after Congress confirmed it wasn’t Matt Walsh), I’ve seen him as nothing but a huge d-bag, and now he’s getting what’s coming to him. Next stop, the unemployment line.

Fugaze (9-7 last week, 75-83 overall) won last week, again, and is charging toward Helmet (8-8 last week, 87-71) and Tubesteak (7-9 last week, 78-79 overall) for the Decent Football Picks Championship.

Anyway, here are the lines on this week’s games, taken straight from Las Vegas: Green Bay (-11) at Detroit, Oakland (+13½) at Dallas, Giants (-6½) at Denver, Indy (-3½) at Houston, Cleveland (+14) at Cincy, Chicago (+11) at Minnesota, Washington (+9½) at Philly, Miami (-3) at Buffalo, Arizona (+2) at Tennessee, Seattle (-3) at St. Louis, Tampa Bay (+12½) at Atlanta, Carolina (+3) at New York Jets, Jacksonville (+3) at San Francisco, K.C. (+13½) at San Diego, Pisstburgh (+1) at Baltimore and New England (+3) at New Orleans.

Helmet Head’s picks: Green Bay, Dallas, New York, Houston, Cincy, Washington, Chicago, Miami, Seattle, T.B., Carolina, San Fran, K.C., Baltimore and New England.

Tubesteak: Detroit, Oakland, Denver, Peyton Manning, Cincy, Minnesota, Washington, Miami, Tennessee, Atlanta, Seattle, Jets, Jacksonville, San Diego, Baltimore and New England.

Fugaze: Lions, Cowboys, Giants, Houston, Cincy, Chicago, Washington, Miami, Arizona, St. Louis, Atlanta, Jets, Jaguars, San Diego, Pittsburgh and New England

So how do we think the Pats will fare on Monday night?

Helmet Head (Pats 51, Saints 47): “Rumor has it, when Belichick hangs up the clipboard, he’s going into the catering business.”

Tubesteak (Pats 42, Saints 17): “Hurricane Bill Belichick comes into New Orleans and rips the roof off the Superdome. It gets so absurd that some Pats players come out of the lockeroom to perform Mungo Jerry’s “In Summer Time” during halftime. The Pats halftime show becomes known as the biggest ‘slap in the face’ in the history of sports.”

Fugaze (Pats 48, Saints 40): We’re in for a thriller on Monday night. Pats pull this one out and it becomes one of those “remember the Saints Game?” games everyone talks about when the P-Men win the Super Bowl.

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