Thursday Ramblings

Michelle Thompson suffers from PSAS

Meet Tubesteak’s dreamgirl, Michelle Thompson, above. What makes her Tube’s top babe? She has a rare medical condition called Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome. Her condition forces her to constantly crave some loving. She has 300 orgasms a day! Her recent plight is noteworthy, though. She has dated men on and off but has never found one who can satisfy her endless cravings for sex. But don’t pity her, she has found a new man and is thrilled about it. Apparently, her neighbor is the man of her dreams. She says they do it 10 times a day and she constantly has a smile on her face. That would make me smile. … People say the recession is over, but tell that to all the unemployed guys out there. Well, I just might have a part-time gig that is fun and pays pretty decently for you jobless fellas out there: Become sperm donors! Here’s how it works: Walk into a sperm bank, answer some questions, meet with some administrator and jack off in a cup. The lab will test it, and if your count is high enough and you don’t have AIDS or any other disease, they will ask you to sign a contract asking you to come in twice a week to whack off in a cup. When your six-month agreement runs out, the lab will save the samples and sit on them for six months for more testing. At the end of the six months, head back in and collect up to $50 for every jack-off session. That’s roughly $2,500 for flogging the dolphin a few times a week. The Sperm Bank Directory has more information and a map to find a bank in your area. There’s one in Cambridge for all you Boston fellas. … Three links for your enjoyment this Thursday: 1) Moviefone offers its best disaster movie scenes. I vote for NYC getting tidal-waved in Deep Impact; 2) Got a shitload of extra cash lying around? Here’s seven outrageously expensive things no rich asshole can do without; and 3) Newsweek takes a look at the 10 worst predictions of the decade. No. 8 still pains me to think about. … Want more proof that Gerard Butler, aka Leonidas from “300,” is the man? He admitted on a British TV show that he has more threesums that twosums. … Today would have been Miss Elizabeth‘s 49th birthday if she didn’t die of a drug overdose in 2003 at the home of Lex Luger. Miss Elizabeth, whose real name is Elizabeth Ann Hulette and was married to Randy “Macho Man” Savage for many years, was in a relationship with Luger at the time of her death. She ended up working at the front desk of a gym Luger owned after she couldn’t cut it in the wrestling business any longer. … Happy 74th birthday to Jack Welch, also known as the Father of Management. He is arguably the most influential American businessman in history and his works are mandatory reading for business students at many universities around the country. Did you know that Welch, the former CEO of General Electric who is worth $750 million, teaches a class at MIT to hand-picked business students focusing on leadership. …  Thursday Ramblings will not appear next week because of the holiday and will return to Decent Community on Dec. 3.


One Response

  1. disaster movie is hilarious, i laugh for hours just watching that movie ,,’

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